New and Old
by victoriasecret23
Summary: Carter comes leaves France to go back to work at County General after calling it quits with Kem. New feelings for an old friend consume him in the worst possible way. CarterDeb...Set in 2008.. other characters pairings


Disclaimer- I do not own ER or its characters. I just write these fictional stories for your enjoyment.

A/N: Carter comes leaves France to go back to work at County after calling it quits with Kem. New feelings for an old friend consume him in the worst possible way.

**Title: New and Old- Chapter 1- Why?**

_Carter's P.O.V-_

Why am I here again? It's too cold. Winter here is a whole lot colder than Paris and the Congo, that's for sure. It's earlier in the day meaning it won't get much colder after this, hopefully. Snow, I remember that stuff all right, it's all too familiar yet an unsettling blur. I can't remember the last time I wore a coat, gloves, and a scarf, was it two years ago? It's been a long time since I've been here in Chicago, too long.

My first shift back at County doesn't start for another twenty minutes, yet I'm standing a block away watching the ambulances drive swiftly up to the emergency entrance. The sound of sirens and frightened patients doesn't faze me anymore; eleven years at County will do that to you. I watch and I wait. I see some friendly familiar faces and some not so familiar, nor friendly. I recognize the notoriously strict Kerry Weaver yelling at a couple of what seem to be interns, Sam the confident and persistent nurse, and finally Dr. Abby Lockhart, who I have yet to figure out. I'm anxiously standing on this curb trying to draw a conclusion as to why I reapplied at County. Out of all the hospitals and clinics in America, why am I standing here, across from County?

I know why I'm here. The whole ordeal cuts deeper into my mind than a butcher's knife. I spent two years living with a ghost, Kem. Living with her in Paris, proved to be a life not worth living. Our life together dwelt on the death of our son, allowing neither of us to move on in any direction. I would get out of bed in the morning, go to work, and come home to find her locked in the bathroom pouring her heart out in front of the mirror above the sink. Despite my efforts, I couldn't comfort her, and now I know she didn't want me to. It doesn't matter that I left, the tears we've shared over the years would've drowned our miserable lives right down the drain. So I left Paris, something both of us wanted and definitely something we both desperately needed. We've agreed to keep in touch, but I've been in Chicago for a week and no word from her yet.

It's time for me to walk in. As I walked through the double automatic doors, a roar of anguish, laughter, and frustration filled the room. Doctors rushed past me without the slightest clue of my existence. So many new faces I would have to get use to, but one face needed no introduction. She's suturing up a little boy's hand as I walked over. The boy was flinching in agony because of the painful needle she used. I watched her coach him through it by singing. This is something I've never seen or heard her do before; it was calming, serene, and peaceful. The boy began to calm down, wiping the hot tears from his little face, he finally smiled at her. When her song was finished, I pulled back the large curtain that separated us.

"John?" Dr. Chen exclaimed.

"Deb? What are you doing here?" I asked just as surprised. Her sweet round face was stunned but welcoming. I haven't seen her in four years, but she still looked the same. The only difference was she grew her hair longer and it was pulled back into a ponytail. She wore dark red lipstick but no other make-up. Her face was so natural, beautiful even.

She rose from the stool to hug me. "It's Jing-Mei remember? I guess Deb is alright though. Well anyway yeah, I'm back in Chicago. Probably for good. What have you been up to?"

"I was in Paris, but now I'm here, probably for good," I smiled. It was great to see her. To be perfectly honest, she's a great doctor and we've worked well together in the past. I look forward to working with her again.

"Have you seen Weaver? She was wondering if you were going to come in early, she has something to show you. I better finish this up so I'll see you around later. Hope you have a good first day back. "

For a moment it felt like I never left County. I would've run into the trauma room when I saw Dr. Kovac carry in a stab wound victim if Deb hadn't reminded me it was my first day back. I nodded at her, hopeful to run into her later. I spotted Jerry and Frank behind the front desk and decided to make an appearance.

"Dr. Carter," Jerry staggered, "Welcome back."

I walked into the round cubicle to shake both of their hands. Attitudes around County were the same. Frank was yelling in the phone at incoming calls, Jerry was trying to sort out the millions of files on the desk, and Dr. Morris was clearing the board before discharging patients. Good old County.

"Carter, glad to have you back man. How was Africa, France, or Mongolia? What ever, it's your first day back right? Yeah, we should probably get you up to speed here, so here you can you take this irritable bowel in examine room four, my shift's almost over and I gotta go," Morris ranted.

Just as I remember him. Morris was a man of many words. His words meant he'd pass off a patient so he wouldn't have to deal with them. I can't tell you how many of Morris' patients got past onto me my last year here. Ultimately it was probably for the better.

"I have to go find Kerry," I responded. Much to his disappointment, I left him scratching his head trying to find some poor intern to pass his charts off to.

Before I was able to make it down the hall Kerry limped towards me in a hurry, "John, you're here. Welcome back, come with me."

I followed her into the lounge where she quickly showed me to my old locker. I opened it up and a brand new lab coat with my name on it hung from a single hook.

"We still have your old one, it's in a box somewhere, but I figured you could use a fresh start by wearing a brand new one."

"No, this is great thank you. I really appreciate it. This is great, really. Thank you Dr. Weaver."

I always tend to over say things when my mind is filled with tension. I've gone through a lot during my previous years at County and being here suddenly stirs up those old feelings.

"Carter, if there's anything you need come find me. I know you'll be able to handle this so I'm counting on you. Here's my pager number. I'm going to be in a conference meeting this morning, but don't hesitate to call if you need me okay?" she sighed in relief, glad to have one of her favorite doctors back at County. "Good to have you back John."

I thanked her and then she was on her way out the door. I pulled on my new white coat, adjusted my blue tie, and grabbed my old stethoscope from my locker. Usually my locker would jam on me when I tried to open it, but I guess its last tenet had someone come by and fix it. This definitely was a brand new start.

"Dr. Carter, welcome back," Chuny greeted while she poured herself a cup of coffee in the lounge. Haleh was in fridge retrieving the milk and she too gave me a warm welcome.

"Good to be back," I answered. I was pleased to see how many of the nurses still worked here. No matter how many doctors left, the number of nurses seemed to remain the same. They were caring and hard working people who never receive the respect they deserve.

"Carter, we have a multiple G.S.W coming in about a minute. You think you can handle it?" Haleh asked sarcastically.

"Thanks Haleh. I'm on it," I smiled. I ran out into the hallway when I heard the ambulance pull up. Abby darted past me in the lobby. She flashed a passive smile at me while pulling on her surgical gloves. I didn't respond, partly because we were all rushing in the same direction but mainly because I wasn't sure how to react to her standoffishness.

"Carter, Dr. Carter," Haleh yelled after me. She threw me a pair of gloves and a trauma gown. I slipped them on without hesitation, ready for my first patient back here at County.

**_

* * *

_**"Hey, man that hurts!" an angry young Hispanic man yelled at Carter in distress. 

"Try to stay still Mr. Gutierrez," Abby said calmly while removing one of the bullets with tweezers.

"_Ouch_! You bitch! Stop stabbing me! Can't you see I've been shot!"

"Dr. Lockhart isn't the one who shot you Mr. Gutierrez, now hold still," Carter stated firmly while injecting morphine into Mr. Gutierrez I.V.

"Ah, what are you doing to me _holmes_?" Mr. Gutierrez asked anxiously and then he lost consciousness.

"What's his BP?" Abby demanded.

Haleh checked the monitor, "110 over 80. Stats are falling."

"He needs surgery. He's suffering from pulmonary edema. If we don't get the other two bullets out one of them might pierce his heart or lung…" Carter muttered.

"We don't have any surgeons down here," Abby informed him.

"Rib spreaders!" Carter yelled. He cracked open the man's chest while Abby tubed him.

"Are you going to rush him upstairs with his chest open like this?" Abby inquired.

"Chuny I need suction," Carter called as the nurse rushed to his side.

"Pressure's dropping," Haleh yelled.

The beeping noise of the monitor frustrated Carter, "Push another unit of Atropine!"

"He needs to go up to surgery," Abby insisted.

"Not until I get his pressure back up." Carter glanced up at her. He took a syringe and pulled out as much blood from Mr. Gutierrez's chest as possible. He watched as his pressure slowly rise to a stable state.

Abby looked over at Carter surprised, "Haleh, page Dr. Treble and tell him Mr. Gutierrez's is on his way up to surgery."

Chuny and the other nurses rolled Mr. Gutierrez out of the trauma room and into the elevator where Dr. Treble was waiting for them. Abby and Carter were left in the room pulling off their blood soaked gowns.

"Wow, three gun shot wounds and he was still alert and functioning on arrival," Abby sighed in disbelief.

"Must be the water," Carter smiled, "Chicago hasn't changed much has it?"

Abby was concentrating on removing her gown and gloves and then she nonchalantly looked up at Carter, "Nope, not much change," she smiled unreceptively.

"How have you been?" he prodded further.

"Good," she replied in her usually Abby-like tone.

"That's good. Are you still with Luka? You haven't tied the knot yet have you?" Carter grinned shyly as he cast his head down to the floor and scratched the back of his head.

"We're still together, not married though."

"That's good that you're still together."

"Yeah, mm hmm. How are you and Kem? I heard you two got married, congratulations." she nodded.

"Oh, we're not together anymore. It ended months ago," he shook his head decisively.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't know."

Carter folded his arms across his chest, "It's not your fault. I guess wearing my wedding ring gives off that impression."

"Yeah I guess. Well I have other patients, will you excuse me," Abby rhetorically asked as she scooted past Carter.

Carter felt disappointed and shunned. Besides knowing Abby and Luka were back together, he didn't really know what was going on with her personally. She looked even gloomier than the last time he saw her. He wondered if she was really happy with Luka.

"Get out of the way!" Dr. Kovac shouted while wheeling the next trauma patient into the room. As a result of being in the way, the old man on the gurney threw up all over Carter's new lab coat. He made his way out of the room irritably and briefly watched as Dr. Kovac and Dr. Ray Barnett worked on their patient.

So far the day was frustrating and complicated. It was almost time for his lunch break so he decided to go look for Deb and see if she was on her way to lunch too. What he needed now was an old friend to cheer him up, and since she was always there for him, he thought now would be no different. Of course he had to change his lab coat before looking for Deb so he headed for the lounge.

"Carter, Dr. Carter," Dr. Neela Rasgotra smiled as she approached him.

"Neela? It's good to see you," he answered.

They exchanged a friendly hug, "I heard you were coming back. How is your first day going?" she asked, staring at his vomit stained lab coat she cringed.

"It's been, interesting, to say the least," he chuckled lightly, noticing that his coat was beginning to smell rancid.

"Well take it easy, we've been known to drive away new doctors," Neela giggled as she walked away in the other direction.

"Will do." He finally made it to the lounge and when he shoved his dirty lab coat into his locker he noticed someone else was also in the room. He took a peak over the couch and recognized the familiar face. "Dr. Pratt, falling asleep on the job like old times huh?"

Pratt woke up abruptly. Startled by Carter's wake up call, he rubbed his face and stood up, "John Carter, where the hell have you been doc?" he asked sarcastically.

"Around," Carter smiled.

"So what brings you to the lounge my friend? Starting your first shift back?"

"No, actually I just got done with my first trauma. I've been here for a while now and it's time for me to go to lunch."

"Lunch? Already? No man you see, in the old days we use to get up at the crack of dawn and wouldn't get a lunch break for a week," Pratt laughed gingerly. "Just playin with you man, I'm on my lunch break too, I'm just waiting for my lunch date."

"Oh really? Who are you chasing around the ER these days?" Carter asked enthusiastically.

"Greg, are you ready?" Deb asked as she swung the lounge door open, not noticing Carter at first. She had entered the lounge so quickly Carter didn't have a chance to understand what was happening.

"I was in here waiting for you," Pratt told her. He flashed a cocky smile at Carter and proceeded to walk out with Deb.

"How's your day so far Carter?" she asked promptly.

He looked down at the floor like he always did when he felt overwhelmed. "It's not what I expected," he grinned, but with much discontent.

* * *

Well I hope you liked this chapter. It's my first ER fiction so tell me what you think. Reviews are very well appreciated! I'll try and work some more chapters in but it might take me a while. 


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